What is important to you?

 

What do you desire but talk yourself out of?

 

Is it a different job?

 

A new hobby?

 

A dream vacation?

 

Growth in a relationship?

 

Learning a new skill?

 

Where does the ability to struggle, fail, get up and repeat come from?

 

As a side note, I want to clarify my thoughts around “failure”. I don’t believe in it. I don’t believe we ever fail. I believe we gain insight and information from every experience we have, even if it yields a different end result. I believe the experiences give us wisdom and knowledge that we either didn’t have at the outset or that we had and needed to tap into.

 

Back to the question at hand…three key aspects to embrace are self-love, courage and trust.

 

Self-love seems to be a concept that is a bit mystifying. Sure, we all like ourselves well enough, but self-love includes deep respect and acceptance. Self-love quiets the critic that lives in the mind. Self-love is about owning your worthiness. Self-love is embracing your right to be seen and heard for who you are, not for who others want you to be. Self-love is honoring you before all others. Self-love is integrating ALL of your experiences as important pieces of who you are…especially the ones that are most strongly rejected. Without self-love, letting yourself fail will be hard enough…not to mention getting back up again.

 

Here are some definitions of courage:

*the ability to do something that frightens one

*the mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty.

*the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear

 

To fuss a little with semantics, I would tweak the last definition to read, “the quality of mind AND spirit”. Courage is tapping into the intelligence, imagination and intuition of the mind and marrying it to the purity and strength of the heart.

 

Courage is tapping into the intelligence, imagination and intuition of the mind and marrying it to the purity and strength of the heart.

 

(Yes, it was intentional to have that sentence repeated.)

 

Courage is strong, yet filled with love and gentleness.

 

Trust is essentially the end result of combining self-love and courage.

 

Trust involves vulnerability, surrender and freedom from expectations or outcomes. That’s why it plays a role in “failing”, getting up and “failing” again. To shift the mindset from failure to gaining insight and information requires being unattached to a specific outcome. It involves trusting that whatever is experienced in the moment is essential to growth, no matter how uncomfortable. The feelings swirling around the perceived failure will settle, the information will present itself and growth will occur.

 

I find it easy to slip into doubt and away from trust. Not intentionally, but out of a fear-based response. When I am experiencing struggle with someone or something that is important to me, it’s not always easy to trust that I am making the “right” decision. It’s in these moments that I need to remind myself that every decision I make is the “right” decision. Everything I choose leads me to a space of greater awareness. As a dear friend reminded me, I have the opportunity every day to make a different decision. I am not stuck with choice I made for eternity.

 

You are your own best teacher.

 

You are your own best source of knowledge.

 

Nobody knows you like you know yourself. Use that to your advantage.

 

Choose you.

Posted in Acceptance, Awareness, Courage, Love, Trust