I love the fact that this quote spoke to me and then received an affirmation of this at the last of our parish mission sessions with Jeanne Cotter. She shared a pretty incredulous story with us, leaving us all in shocked silence…and concluded with the message that everything is a gift. Forgive and love beyond…deeper than…the incident. See people as good regardless of their actions.

 

I have been deeply affected by Jeanne’s presence these last four days. Her message rings true and carries the challenge of loving…really loving. When she spoke of our minds being in the reactive mode, allowing the fear or threat of attack/judgment to usurp our ability to be present, it brought up the concept of getting in touch with the silence within. It wasn’t my initial thought when this quote came across my path, but it makes sense. If we use the breath (inhale for a count of 5, suspend the breath for a count of 5 and then exhale for a count of 5) to silence the monkey chatter, we can go within to see the gift. We can be present with what is right in front of us.

 

Jeanne also spoke of the negativity bias. She gave examples of how much easier it is to criticize and find fault rather than notice the good. In addition to that, it is the awareness of how negative comments-in general-tend to be the first response. I admit to losing track of where she went right after that because I realized how easy it is to allow negativity to be my baseline response to things. I was flooded with examples from the last few days where I immediately went to a negative response…no gift in sight. When my reactive mind is reacting, negativity is holding hands with it. It was so humbling. Get in touch with the silence within and notice the gift.

 

Another powerful take away for me was when Jeanne challenged us to recognize the person/personality trait which makes us reactive and easily triggered. In addition to the breathing technique she taught us, she offered two phrases to keep readily available, especially in these moments: “Tell me more about that” and “Help me understand.” WHOA! It diffuses the reactivity and invites presence, opening the mind and heart to compassion. Again…get in touch with the silence within.

 

From an even more personal place, Jeanne’s sessions invite me to go to the silence within to explore my relationship with love…giving…receiving…being grateful…and noticing the “conditions” that I have attached to love. Not to mention the various angles of love…self-love, love of Divine, love of my spouse, love of those in my inner-circle, my outer-circle and love of those I don’t even know. Then I can go even further and explore how love is connected to respect, reverence and gratitude, noticing the abundance of gifts in my life and asking myself if I experience love for:

*my life

*the experiences that have informed who I am

*the gifts I use daily in my work

*my health

*my home

*food to eat

*a safe neighborhood to live in

*the cornucopia of nature surrounding me

*all of the things and people that are so easy to take for granted

 

Can I quiet my own negativity bias enough to be present with the gifts in my life?

 

Getting in touch with the silence within doesn’t have to mean starting a meditation practice, though it certainly can. Getting in touch with the silence within can be as mindful as taking an intentional breath to quiet the reactive mind and be present with and grateful for the gift being offered.

 

Posted in Awareness, Jeanne Cotter, Love, Silence